The decision to have another baby is a very personal one and sometimes you and your partner may not agree about the prospect or the timing. It may be helpful to discuss future children with a doctor or paediatrician.
You may find that having another baby can be a worrying time, with many mixed feelings: happiness and anxiety, overwhelming love and fear of loving too much.
If your child was over a year old, you may already be pregnant again, or have another very young baby.
If you are in a new relationship your new partner may have difficulty understanding your thoughts and feelings, especially if they have not experienced the strength of the bond that exists between a parent and child. It is helpful to talk honestly about such feelings and to try to show patience if they lack understanding at first. It may be helpful to show your new partner this leaflet and other literature on sudden infant death.
Whatever your situation, contact with the Care of Next Infant (CONI) programme can be a great support.
Availability of CONI (Care of Next Infant Programme) in your area
Working with local public healthcare providers we facilitate a service for bereaved parents. CONI is available through health visitors, midwives, paediatricians and GPs, but unfortunately CONI is not available everywhere.
CONI is currently available in many areas of England, Wales, Northern Ireland. Each area has a local co-ordinator who will discuss with parents the support available and arrange a plan of care with parents and professionals. Where CONI is available, this programme is for parents who are expecting / given birth to a baby following the sudden unexpected death of their baby. Some areas are able to offer the programme to parents who are bereaved for other reasons, you will need to ask your midwife.
The programme is usually offered for 6 months after the baby is born but may be longer depending on the individual circumstances.
About CONI
Through CONI, parents may:
- Receive regular contact ( home visits & telephone conversations) from their health visitor, so they can talk freely about any worries and seek advice
- Borrow movement monitors which pick up movements as the baby breathes, and will ring an alarm if movements stop for longer than 20 seconds
- Receive training on basic life support so parents will know what to do if their baby stops breathing before professional help is available.
- Use a symptom diary to record their baby’s health, which they can then discuss with their health visitor or show to a medical professional, when they are worried.
- Use the Baby Check App to help to decide when their baby is unwell and needs to seek medical help.
- Monitor their baby’s growth with a detailed weight chart to detect changes that may mean baby should be checked by a doctor
- Receive a room thermometer and guidance on baby bedding and clothing
- Receive a ‘passport’ so that if the parents’ are worried that their baby is unwell, they can be seen quickly by the right person either at the GP or Hospital
For further details about CONI and the availability of CONI in your area, please email coni@lullabytrust.org.uk.
“My wonderful, wonderful consultant and midwife team made me aware of the CONI Scheme. This became a lifeline for me. As I neared the end of my pregnancy, the CONI programme offered me and my family first aid training in our home and provided an apnoea monitor for our baby to monitor his breathing as they do in hospitals. A sophisticated piece of equipment, which gave me great comfort in the early months.”
